So, Ava’s seventh birthday came and went without me writing about it.  I’ve remembered at inconvenient times since then, so I finally made a note to remind myself to write something, because I don’t want to miss the chance to stop and think about the precious gift that Ava is.

Ava continues to reinforce her reputation as our putzy princess.  Not in a bad way, though.  She just never rushes through anything.  Although she is very quick on her feet, she takes her time with everything else.  And despite being incredibly capable at many things, she is happy to have others do things for her.  It does sometimes cross the line into laziness, but mostly I think that being “served” is just what communicates love to her.

Ava is an excellent student, and though she is no quicker at schoolwork than anything else, she works diligently until her assignments are completed, does everything with exceptional thoroughness, and rarely struggles with understanding.  Her quick mind is evident also in her ability to keep up with older siblings in board games, in her insightful observations, and her clever creations.

She also loves art and has a great eye for color and dimension.  I often can’t tell her artwork from that of her older siblings (none of whom I would consider to be deficient in artistic ability).

And as she gets older, there are new facets to her personality coming through.  Though (almost) always gracious and cheerful when playing a game, there is a competitiveness that is also coming through.  She has learned that she really prefers to win!  Ava also is becoming more sure of her convictions.  When she thinks she’s right, she stands her ground, which is still a bit surprising coming from our girl who has always been quick to relent in favor of just getting along.  Still, she remains a peacemaker in most situations, often preferring others before herself and making choices that promote peace in a situation.

Ava loves to snuggle close and still benefits greatly from a big hug when she’s having a hard time.  She’s sensitive, but also strong and able to move past hurts when she needs to.  She is funny and sweet and kind, and even at seven is still mostly endearing to those around her.  I love her so much and, even though I’m a little late, I greatly value the time and reflection it takes to note the things that stand out to me as unique and special at this seven year milestone.

Today is our Bug’s birthday.  Our living room is decked out in yellow balloons and yellow streamers, because yellow is, and has been, his favorite color, by far, since before he could talk.  And, like his color preference, Nathanael has a lot of very obvious and distinct personality traits.  He continues to be a big fan of white chocolate, anything lemon, and grilled cheese.  He is (almost) always excited to help with any home improvement, car repair, or mechanical “fixes” around the house.  He is the most likely among his siblings to ask questions about our morning devotional, or about a math assignment, or about how something works, or about why something happened.  He always – ALWAYS – hangs back with whoever is lagging behind when we’re going somewhere together, often quiet and unassuming in his personal conviction in this.

As a twelve-year old boy, there are obviously still growth areas, though even in these he is consistent in his propensities.  He is quick to have a witty comeback in any situation (even, at times, inappropriate ones…hence, the need for growth).  He still answers the question “I wonder what will happen if…?” by doing, rather than by reasoning, much too often.  He is generally of the opinion that if something isn’t working, more force will fix it.  All things that sometimes don’t work out so well for him, but he is learning to rein in these tendencies.

I admit, there are days when I still miss my little toddler boy reliably plopping down next to me in the morning, demanding snuggles before he would start his day (how could I not miss that??), but I absolutely love my twelve-year old Nathanael, and all the years we’ve had in between.  He is an exceptional gift and a wonderful joy to my heart and to our family.  I am truly excited and grateful to be able to celebrate him today.

So, Isabelle’s 5th birthday came and went, along with all the usual celebratory trappings, but I forgot to note it in a blog post.  Life is always busy in May, and especially so this year, it seems, but it matters to me that I take time to write about each of my kids on their birthdays.

With Isabelle in particular, and this year in particular, it matters even more.  Because this year has been tough on my Sweetpea, I think. She is in that unenviable position of not being in school yet, but not really needing my attentions to manage most of her day-to-day existence.  So, while the older kids have a built-in amount of attention in the form of teaching and directing in chores and answering school-related questions, and while Lucas is in that mode of needing constant oversight if I hope for the very structure of our home to make it through a day, Isabelle has, unfortunately, been left to fend for herself too much of the time.

On top of that, she was really hit hard by her Grandma passing away this year.  Even though her comprehension of it all was, I’m sure, a little fuzzy, she lost someone who lavished her with attention, who was always willing to answer a question, or let her water flowers and fill bird feeders, or be a glad recipient of Isabelle’s forceful hugs.  A void was definitely left in my little girl’s heart by this loss.

Nonetheless, Isabelle has paved a way for herself in so many things.  She persistently asks questions, and will volunteer to do ANYTHING, even things she just can’t quite do yet.  She has learned her letters and numbers and counting to a hundred and spelling her name, and so many random facts about things simply by being inquisitive, and without any prompting from me.

She absolutely loves singing and dancing and just performed in her very first dance recital.  She daily requests an audience for her latest Isabelle-original song or dance, which she always performs with great expressiveness and energy.

Isabelle is amazingly articulate.  She has an impressive vocabulary and is an exceptionally clear communicator for a five-year-old, although she occasionally struggles with shyness in unfamiliar situations, at which point she will staunchly refuse to utter a single word.

She is a born nurturer.  Whenever someone isn’t feeling good, she is quick to take care of them, and sticks with them throughout the day to attend to every need (which she does quite well).

Her natural personality is best characterized as exuberant.  She hops her way through life, bounces into hugs, gives the biggest, cheesiest grins anytime a camera is pointed her way, laughs loud (and screams loud).  She does everything with flair.  She LOVES playing dress-up and pretend. She is intelligent and determined and silly and strong and loving.

I am so thankful for her and I love her beyond words.

Last week, Lucas had his second birthday.  Two years has flown by, and now my baby isn’t so much of a baby any more.  He is in full-fledged I want to do what my older siblings are doing mode, from chores, to schoolwork, to playing games and building with Legos.

In many ways, Lucas has broken the mold of my expectations these past two years.  From his first year with constant spit-up, late teeth, persistent finger sucking, and uncanny physical strength and coordination, to this past year with his ability to defy any childproofing attempts, his tenacity against which I am woefully mismatched, and his acute intelligence which is only mildly veiled by his as-yet limited speaking vocabulary, my ability to predict his forthcoming strengths and challenges has proven to be lacking.

On one hand, he is intense and demanding and dissatisfied with anything that doesn’t completely meet his “requests”, but on the other hand, he has a compassion and gentleness towards someone who is hurting that was not evident in his older siblings.  He rarely says any intelligible words apart from Mommy, Daddy, and a few other staples, but will occasionally blurt out an entire sentence as clear as day.  He loves bath-time when the water is running, but hates it any other time.

Yet, still, there are the normal 2-year-old boy things, too. He loves cars and trucks…well, anything with wheels, really.  He runs and climbs and jumps and bangs his head on all kinds of things.  He has started loving books – his current favorites being Peek-A-Who, A Good Day, Froggy Goes to Bed, I Love it When You Smile, and God Bless You and Goodnight.  He will usually willingly go to bed at night, but insists on being picked up any time he wakes up (I have lost my will to stand my ground at 3am…for now, at least).  He loves going outside at recess time, and even knows to go grab socks from his drawer and bring them to me with his shoes.  He loves french fries, and bananas, and pretzels, and macaroni and cheese, and corn, and cookies…but there are many more things that he won’t eat without a fight.  He is silly and funny and loves to be the center of attention.  He needs to work on obedience, but has at least learned to obey stop! (the most important first step, in my opinion).

Lucas sometimes makes me feel like I’m in over my head, but his presence in our lives is immeasurably valuable.  His biggest of big smiles, the way he sort of gallops away when he’s excited, and the out-of-the-blue hugs and kisses are some of my very favorite parts of any day.  I have loved being Lucas’s mom these past two years, and I am so excited to watch him grow, and to know him more and better in the years to come.  He is loved beyond words.

Today, Bethany is 13 years old.  So here, 13 things about our Bethany Kaitlyn:

1 – She is strong-willed.  Though always a defining characteristic, she has learned to (mostly) use it well, and yield when necessary.

2 – She is great at math.  She doesn’t always get the best grades (though she has improved her attention to detail by leaps and bounds this year), but she very rarely struggles with understanding.

3 – She loves animals.  I’ve tried to explain the lack of logic in such a strong affection, but she persists in it nonetheless.  It is possible that I’m just a bit less compassionate than she is.

4 – When at home, she seems incapable of sitting down without pulling her knees up to her chest…except at the dinner table, which might only be because the table impedes her progress.

5 – She is beautiful.  Tall and strong and always tanned, with dimpled cheeks and big brown eyes (on the outside).  Quick to laugh, quick to forgive, cheerful and optimistic (on the inside).

6 – She loves Jesus.  Simply and completely and without reservation.

7 – She can put both feet behind her head at the same time…a feat I’ve never been able to accomplish (lame pun intended).

8 – She is still, and possibly forever, a fan of anything sparkly or shiny or fluffy.

9 – She is most easily offended in life by her 9 year old brother.  Always.

10 – She is, literally, the exact picture of a small child chasing a butterfly.  Chores and schoolwork and attentiveness, in general, often succumb to her as yet uncontrolled ability to be distracted.

11 – She is a gifted artist.  It just makes sense to her, I guess.  I enjoy so much seeing any new drawing or painting or clay sculpture she creates.

12 – She can now, after many years of diligent practice…drumroll, please…walk in a straight line.

13 – She is indescribably precious to, and immeasurably loved by us.

We are so excited to walk alongside and celebrate with Bethany today.  She is a one-of-a-kind treasure.

Caedmon is 15.  Despite my deep desire for time to stop for just a little while, it marches on, still.  In the past 6 months, Caedmon has outgrown 2 pants sizes and his voice is now more man than boy.  My guess is that the next six months will find us packing away a few more sizes of pants…but I really don’t want to get ahead of myself in all of this.  Instead, I will take this moment to reflect on who Caedmon is right now, in these fleeting days.

On one hand, Caedmon is the same Caedmon as always – diligent, particular, hard-working, relishing any chance for “play”.  He excels in all of his schoolwork, to the point where I have to re-learn (and re-learn, and re-learn again, sometimes) the math concepts he’s working on…and often he “gets” them much more quickly than I do.  He still spends most of his free time building with legos, though he will occasionally forego that in favor of a game of Castle Risk, or to watch a favorite movie.  His saxophone playing continues to improve by leaps and bounds, and he regularly sits down at the piano to try to hammer out a new song.  At the end of this past summer, after earning money by restoring and painting some of our windows, he set out to build himself a rowboat.  He found plans online and has planned, purchased, measured, cut, glued, and epoxy-ed his way most of the way through this project, with plans to be finished by the time fishing weather rolls around.  As always, he has big ideas AND the determination to see them accomplished.  He is steady and dependable and hopeful and principled.

But, there have been some subtle changes, too.  I think he is more sure of himself…less concerned about trying to fit anyone else’s mold.  He is more grounded, recognizing more readily the difference between a pie-in-the-sky notion, and something that is a real possibility.  He’s giving more thought to his future (though not obsessively so, by any means), and he has a better idea of what interests him and what doesn’t.  In short, I guess, he’s growing up…which, in some ways, makes me more distraught than I could possibly ever explain, but which is also a relief.  A relief knowing that, when the time comes for him to be on his own, he has a good head on his shoulders and a firm foundation under his feet.

But, I won’t be rushing things.  And as always, I am so happy to have this day to pause much of life just to celebrate my firstborn son.  He is a treasure and joy and I will relish every year that I have the responsibility and the privilege to make his birthday a big deal.  I love him more than words.

Yesterday, Elijah turned 9.  My boy who still gives me hugs when he first sees me in the morning, and kisses on cheeks, chin and forehead every night, is getting older.

He is one-of-a-kind.  Our lefty, who plays harmonica and trombone, whose favorite color is black, who asked for a unicycle and stilts for Christmas/birthday presents, who will (sometimes) go out of his way to choose the out-of-the-ordinary, just because.  He stands out in our family with his quick wit, quick feet, quirky drawings, and unique sense of style.

He struggles with maintaining a good work ethic, but what he learns, he learns well, and what he does, he does well.  I see some of myself in him in this, though I haven’t really figured out how to help him overcome the propensity to leave work undone.  So we just plug away at it, reminding, correcting, praising a job well-done, re-doing half-baked assignments…and he’s making progress, slowly but surely.

On the flip side of things, he is incredibly persistent when he wants to learn something, and rather than trying something for a short while, then giving up, he works diligently until he has figured it out.

He has a lot of wonderful traits, and more that still need to be refined and reined in.  He has his own special way of making me feel loved and valued as a mom, which is so precious to me.  I am beyond thankful for these nine years of his life and I treasure every day with my Buddy.

Our sweet Ava Grace is 6 today.

She is petite, and princess-y, and putzy.

She is soft-spoken, with occasional moments of being extremely loud and boisterous.

She is more than happy to let others serve her, but also volunteers to vacuum and wash windows and peel garlic.

She has become an excellent reader, and is great at math, but struggles to remember things like months of the year, or names, or anything that requires simple memorization with no context to give meaning.

Ava loves dancing, and bike-riding (though still with training wheels, which is mostly the result of parental oversight, rather than anything else), and running, and picking flowers, and blowing bubbles, and building with blocks, and drawing, and painting.

She excitedly does anything her older siblings do, but is also starting to have her own opinionated, and often resolute, voice.  Yet despite her clear preferences, she will often defer to others in order to keep peace.  She loves her little brother and willingly, joyfully plays with him for long stretches of time.

Ava still curls up in a ball and tucks herself in right next to me (or anyone else available for snuggling).  She is moved deeply by affirming words and encouragement, and hugs are still how she receives the most meaningful comfort, consolation, and affection.

She’s moving so slowly into the realm of “girl” without the “little” in front of it that I don’t always notice, but the changes are there. Still adorable, but growing more beautiful now, too.  I love to see her personality emerge in new ways, and I love to see the characteristics she’s always had take on new maturity and strength.  She is simply precious and wonderful.  These six years, she has brought joy and blessing and sweetness to every day.  I love her so very much.

Today, Nathanael turns eleven.  He’s been looking forward to this birthday, in particular, because for some arbitrary reason, this is the age we decided to let our kids start having [decaffeinated] coffee.  He has been a lover of anything coffee-flavored for a while, so the countdown to eleven started well before his tenth birthday.

In addition to coffee, Nathanael is also our white chocolate fiend, and our bright-color admirer, and our child who often prefers “fresh” foods – crisp fruits and vegetables, citrus-y desserts.  He is in a neck-and-neck race with Bethany for the title of resident bookworm.  He is our go-to baby whisperer. He happily helps with any house project.  Nathanael is the kid who will slow down to walk with the person lagging behind, who will still volunteer for the task nobody else wants to do, who will – of his own volition – lay hands on and pray for family members who are sick.

Our Bug has a heart of gold.  He is insightful and funny and a little bit smart-aleck-y…maybe sometimes when he should be serious, but he’s learning.  I love celebrating his birthday, his part of our family that is unique and wonderful that we wouldn’t be complete without.  I’m so thankful for the gift we have in him.  He is absolutely on of the very best gifts I’ve ever received.

Isabelle is four today.

She is full of exuberance and tenacity and heart.

She hugs with abandon (and often gets a running start).  If I ever ask “can someone please [fill in the blank]?”, she dashes off to be the first one to do whatever was asked.  She’ll grab five books when told to get one for reading.  When she’s excited, she literally bounces her way through life; when she’s distraught, her big eyes and quivering lips are about the saddest thing you’ll ever see.

She is stubborn (to a fault sometimes).  She loves fiercely, but is wounded easily.  She is quick-witted and insightful.  She loves pretend play and dressing up, and Fancy Nancy books are her favorite.  She is so many things rough-and-tumble, but she has the girliest giggle and she loves dancing and always asks if she looks beautiful [of course, Sweetpea, you’re ALWAYS beautiful].  She has more personality than she knows what to do with sometimes…eye rolls, hands on hips, wild arm gestures, furrowed eyebrows and more (all at once), and it can be hard to not laugh at all her spunk.

But, oh, I love this little girl with all my heart!  She is a treasure and a joy and such a big part of all that is good in my days.  I’m so glad to celebrate four years with her today.